Friday, December 31, 2010

Good Bye 2010

Last few hours of this super pathetic year..!!
Thank God its over.
As its said..too much of anything is this is it was too much of almost everything..rain..too many events..and now too much cold.
So glad it is over.
Am here waiting for the clock to tick 12'..and a new chapter to begin..with good hope & faith.
Not often do i say this...but am thankful to those people who have been my strength all through this..have stood by me.There is no gesture by which i can express how much i love them.
As always..learned my lessons...and with a promise to myself that i would remember them always...Wishing everybody a extremely happy new year.

Friday, November 26, 2010

Shahrukh bola khubsurat hai tu...!!

A Markand movie...!!
I'll be biased, obvious reasons..its a Sharukh khan starrer.
I like the movie, i like movies with reflect reality & are not that hardcore, which makes you say "hey, that's me" :)
Well this movie is all about how movie stars are worshiped in our country. Rajnikanth is well the best example considering his temples in various parts of country.
This movie had the Badshah khan as the GOD.
So this movie, i was the lead actress, no kidding.
Each & every person insanely crazy about King Khan was the main lead.
Well, the story is not that amusing, very bollywoodish....the geek meets the GOD at traffic signal with the only non-obvious thing that the geek doesn't turn out be a princess by the end.
It we magnify the people of that 70mm screen, how we incorporate themselves in our everyday we make people "SUPERSTARS" and later "GOD".
Remember when as kids we used to think that "Shaktiman" is real & would come to save us if we fall..its similar to that.
Even shaktiman gave a declaration in the beginning of the show that this isn't real, even movies have it when it begins.
But, as kids never believed that its the cables making him fly & we would never ever believe that they too are "people".
We paint them the way we want, give them characteristics the way we want & *baaaam* we have our GOD ready.
Well, to conclude...i would just say...

"shahrukh bola khoobsurat hai tu...aur khoobsurat ho gai mai...."

Saturday, October 2, 2010


Be it a 80 year old person or 8 year old child, they are "on" Facebook. Its a rage or epidemic, can't justify. It says it connects you to family, friends, but the truth is its no more than a "virtual" world.
Facebook, most popular social networking site & to confess i am an addict too. I do not worry so much about my grades..but i wait so anxiously for a notification. Yeah, lame as it may sound.
Everybody i know, has the same symptoms. Being "liked" , being "commented" on was once frowned upon, but not any more. It tells you your popularity & likability. I am a victim won't demolish my own integrity by criticizing it more.
What irks me is how fake can people get, with the presence of an interface between two people how much changes.
I appreciate the fact that with people having so limited time..this is one breather..but how much is enough is yet to be known.
People have a virtual image, that is not even close to what they really are. I say this because i have seen this happening, it's like we are best of friends on facebook & outside, we don't even care to say hie.
I reunited with many of my lost school friends, lets say classmates, because with friends i never lost touch.
Facebook is more of a publicity stunt & everybody needs it, it makes us famous in our own little world.
The only derogatory thing i find in FB is why are people not real. We have an option of reporting if we find a fake profile, but what to do when the real person acts fake.
Facebook is actually a faceless book..!!!!

Friday, September 24, 2010

I believe in old fashioned love..those ways written in eternal love stories...
I can't pounce upon you to let you know i love you & how much you mean to me...what makes me sad & what brings a smile to my face..i believe you would know, all by yourself...
I can't impose myself on you.. i don't know those big words to express emotions..those sentimental lines which say it all...
there are not enough songs..which expresses all i feel...
Am not a "romantic" but i know what love is...
Am not cold hearted, am just shy...!!

With so less time we have together & so much i want you to know....

I can vocal about everything..but not love..
I don't know how to express it....

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Independence for me....

15th August, 2010....India completes glorious 63 years of Independence. Glorious i say because the journey has been rough, yet we managed to shine. People had apprehensions after our years of slavery, but we proved them wrong. We carved our niche & now proudly hoist our flag.

I mind sound like n hypocrite, who in the previous post criticizes the democracy, calls it a filthy place to stay & now, it being the Independence day, is proud of her nation.

I was proud of calling myself Indian the day i wrote that, while i am writing & would be proud till the day i am alive.

Independence day is the most coveted "festival" of our country, lesser than 26th January i would say but it is no less. At least for this very day each & every national says "I am Proud to be an INDIAN." People say its just for the day that we put our flag in our cars, remember the bravery of our soldiers, i say it is the only day we get to express ourselves. We celebrate Father's Day, Mother's Day, Brother's Day, Sister's Day, Friendship's Day, Valentine's Day & every other possible relation day, does that mean we just love our Maa, Daddy, brother-sister, friend or partner that very day..??

It is just a day that we dedicate to them, find time off from the busy lives & let them know they are a part of us & how much we love them. Well, i am too against "specifying & concentrating your love" days because this becomes a day for those cheap sleazy people to try & hit on girls with the worst pick up line ever..."You wanna do fraaandhip with me?" !!@@@!!!###

Old experienced people say that the "youth" of the nation doesn't have that emotion, that patriotism, the zeal with which they fought. I understand their emotion , this fast paced life with no time for self, family or nation leaves them questioning. But, i being a part of youth assure them, they are leaving it in best of hands.

People these days worry about how are we going to impart that patriotism in our child, i would rather say they do not need to "teach" us to love our country, we were not taught to love out parents, we just did.

When i was young my daddy used to teach me national anthem, tell me stories about how my dadaji was involved in the freedom struggle. My daddy was born a year after independence, he heard stories from his father & it passed down to me. As a kid, Daddy used to teach me Bangla, i didn't learn much though....but learnt a patriotic song..a few lines. I used to proudly sing it to my friends. Whenever i read his diary i feel more connected, to some extent feel what they felt. My dadaji was imprisoned for some time, every time i think of it or read it, a painful rush goes through my body. When its so hard for me now to even imagine, my family went through that much.

Its hard earned, it is a treasured possession.

At times, when things aren't the way they should be, when India doesn't seem the kind of nation it should be, i too feel, that i would shift my base to some developed country, where things are done properly. But, that very moment am dreaded by the thought of being called an "immigrant". I am safe from that label here. I feel safe here because its mine, people know me here, they are the way i am.

With all criticism, we appreciate our country too, things need to change & its we who can do it. We are imperfect too. No matter how much we criticize our country, we would never take anybody else criticism.

Tedha hai par mera hai...!!!

p.s: So late after I Day, because of my stupid stupid stomach infection.


Wednesday, August 4, 2010


Saw “RAJNEETI” few days back…and I haven’t yet recovered from shock. 
No, no…the movie is fab, very well made, the backdrop, location, story, music….actors…it’s worth a watch.

It just left me questioning our “DEMOCRACY”. The way it’s been portrayed…it shook me. It left me questioning is this the real way our “democracy” and so called “democratic party” works…ruthless murders.

Long time back S.Shankar’s movie “NAYAK” was on similar lines, a satire on democracy and functioning of government. Rajneeti was completely political plot, protagonists belonged to political families, rallies, political agenda and what not, it’s all shown the movie.

 Rajneeti has probably the finest actors of the industry as the cast, and yes, it very much includes Arjun Rampal. It starts with Naseerudin’s speech at an election rally, with which every common man would agree, “"Ye pet ki maari janta hai mantri waqt ki roti de dijie janab kisi bhi rang ka jhanda utha legi. Aakhir ye kaisi garibi hai bhaiyo jo apke karodo kharch karne pe bhi khtam nahi ho rahi hai”. I have always been a Naseerudin fan, after A Wednesday I was his AC, now what should I be…..? Bad one, it was.

Anyways moving on,  it has a typical hindi movie masala but its not in the typical hindi league. Its way above it. Let it just be a "Prakash Jha Movie". This post of mine is not a review of the movie so wont get too critical about anything, in plain simple words i loved the movie.

But i would surely go critical about the plot of the movie. At first i did not want to believe it all happens for real, but each and every person i asked they answered with "Either you are mad, blind or plain simple dumb" & am none. I was flabbergasted. There was a bit of exaggeration, as told by few, well of course its a movie, fiction and more so creativity, if i may say so, is allowed. But rest all was for R.E.A.L.

I am finding political science amusing these days so i bought NCERT 11th & 12th standard books. These books are confusing too. On one side they praise all about how organized our constitution makers were, how they thought about each and every aspect distinctly and vividly & on the other hand they make those tiny stupid cartoon pop questions at us, which makes us think the exact opposite of it. I know its for us to enhance knowledge and stuff, but its darn confusing, how am i to judge how different it could be had we not "considered" "verses" of other country's constitution. 

I read somewhere that American Constitution has just been amended 10 times in last 250 years compared to ours which as been amended probably 250 times in just 50 years. My reaction was "what the phuck".

I respect & love my country, would always do no matter what. But these things are disturbing, it not only wavers our mind, also puts down the image of our country.

Rajneeti was none-the-less a mirror image of our parties, i wont argue about its uncanny resemblance with the leading political party.Towards the end, when Katrina Kaif is asked to take up the head of the party post and stand in election, she goes up to Madhopur district and gives her speech in which she says "Abhi humare hatho se mehndi ka rang bhi nahi gaya tha ki humse humara sindoor chin liya gaya", i thought to myself, who would fall for that, but i recalled, I MYSELF DID.

Prakash Jha captures reality in frames. Gangajal was one another reality.

As is said by a wise man, "
Any behavior that gets rewarded, gets repeated
". Guess this is why we live in a place where autocracy is spelled n pronounced democracy

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Kissa KURSI ka...!!

I am turning out to be a critic...a die-hard Gandhi follower...!!
Well these days am trying to pull myself together, bring myself back from dead.

So coming back to my thoughts. Tough times teach us as is said by the "wise men". They do teach us, i couldn't agree more. It brings out the true colors of people. But this time it not only showed me the true colors of people around me but the bureaucracy that surrounds me too. I might sound coward and shrewd at the same time, but every "common man" with the only "super power i.e voting" would agree to me.

Government has come down with many reforms, made them available to the "aam janta"; is trying its level best to make people aware of their fundamental rights and how to execute them. For instance, National Human Rights Commission (NHRC), New Delhi ; it is for people run by high profiled bureaucrats is for action against violation of Human Rights. It is in reach of the common man, one just need to give a written complaint and measures would be taken.Even higher, just write to President, the petition would move forward in a speed more than light.

I appreciate these measures taken by the government, but i still put up question, how "executable" are these? Does this mark a full stop forever on Corruption?

It still send shivers down the spine of any common man complaining  about any bureaucrat. No matter how many Human Right cells govt opens, 24X7 call center they set up for the awareness of people. the one thing, the most important thing that they forget to do is to take out the "FEAR" out of people.

Fear of being disgraced, misunderstood, not being heard. Democracy we call it, but its more or less autocracy, monarchy, dictatorship.
People in power take it "US" and their " POWER" both for granted. They have now become so sure that nobody would be able to dent their image.
A sting operation on one negligent politician or bureaucrat, this does not show how effective these measures are. It wasn't that "one person", the entire system.
Yes. i too agree with that "JAAGO RE" advertisement, "YE KHATE HAI KYUKI HUM KHILATE HAI".....but i ask bina khilae kaam banta bhi to nai hai...!!

Most common example, passport office, yes now it can be available to you in just a month after application, but how many of us can obtain it without the help of "Agent" ; imandari se line me khade hokar...!!

Yes i am whining and cribbing about our system but i also say it would change when we enter this system.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Bharat Bandh : Closer or Closure..!!

July 5th, 2010.... yet another "historic day"
India had set another example of unity in diversity, proved that we are the "revolutionaries".
They proved the unity and how.... closing the NATION..!!

It freaked me out when my daddy came back home and told me INDIA is not FUNCTIONING today.It was not just my father, all schools, colleges, institutes, offices observed "BANDH" ; n those who disagreed had to face violent measures and forced to shut down. It was a national holiday.

It was by the opposition parties against price rise. Nobel cause indeed it was, the "aam janta" was suffering a lot due to price rise. Price of milk had increased twice in the same month, first Rs. 30 and then Rs. 32. Sugar became expensive and so did sweet dishes, even tea and coffee. Minimum fare for autos increased from Rs. 10 to Rs. 19, rate of pulses is now equivalent to ghee. Surveys showed that with such price inflation, a commoner cant even spent Rs. 20 each day for his/her meal.

This is cruel, how do they expect people to survive, one cant forgo everything at least not food.

But was this the right way to put forward our demands?? I am not in favor of  the center or opposition nor am against it. I totally support the cause of bandh and the reason they put forward, Congress could have waited for a few more days for parliament session to begin and then with everybody opinion do the right thing. But calling OFF a NATION...this was huge.

I was some where happy because of this "BANDH", due to this the news channel didn't show anything about M.S.Dhoni marrying, i was so sick of it. I pity these celebrities at times, being famous is not a cake walk.

So, bandh was all over the national television, the "neta's" had taken over Dhoni n Sakshi.

The footage of Bandh remined me of Anil Kapoor's "NAYAK". What a film it was, kudos to S.Shankar.
They had this scene in the movie which showed a bus driver caused "CHAKA JAM", flamed the entire city of Mumbai. When asked about his identity he said he belonged to the lower community, same as the chief minister (Amrish Puri). The Commissioner calls the CM to ask what should he do, he says " NO TEAR GAS, NO FIRE, THODI DER CHIKENGE, CHILAENGE, FIR CHUP HO JAENGE AUR BHOOL JAENGE. (No tear gas, no fire, for some time they would scream and shout , and would make peace afterwards)
He said so, because those college kids would help him in election and those lower community people would give him support.

What irony it is, we are the biggest democracy in the world, but we have to take up such violent measures to be heard and put forward our views.

Just two days before this "national holiday" our Prime Minister, Dr. Manmohan Singh inaugrated the 8th best airport in the world, IGI, New Delhi. Our country would be hosting Common Wealth Games, this year is very eventful for our nation. The world is looking at us and this is a bad example set, a bad picture shown.

I would again like to make it clear that am not supporting the center, this price rise has affected my family in the same way it has others. I don't belong to the family to maharajah's to Birla's, my father has retired too n with no other working member in my family it is tough times. But still i do not support the measures of opposition.

This bandh caused economic losses to the national, inconvenience to common man. If it was in favor of common man then why was he punished, burtaly beaten.This national holiday was even more cruel on daily wage earners.

I would like to question the masihas of common man, would this bandh bring down the prices back to normal?
Are they not doing it to fill there vote banks?

To conclude i would use both opposition and center's own words, because tehy themselves describe there intentions clearly.

"It's the people's struggle....aaj to trailer hai, picture abhi baki hai mere dost...." - Nitin Gadhkari | BJP President

"It's actually an anti-public interest step masquerading as public interest activity." - Abhishek Manu Sanghvi | Congress Spokesperson.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

You make me smile...!!

You´re better then the best
I´m lucky just to linger in your life
Cooler then the flip side of my pillow that´s right
Completely unaware
Nothing can compare to where you send me
Lets me know that it´s ok yeah it´s ok
And the moments when my good times start to fade

You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed
Sing like a bird
Dizzy in my head
Spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold
Buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh you make me smile

Even when you´re gone
Somehow you come along
Just like a flower poking through the sidewalk crack and just like that
You steal away the rain and just like that

You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of
bed sing like bird
Dizzy in my head spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold
buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh you make me smile

Don´t know how I lived without you
Cuz everytime that I get around you
I see the best of me inside your eyes
You make me smile
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold
buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild

You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed
sing like bird
Dizzy in my head
spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold
buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh you make me smile
Ohh you make me smile
Ohh you make me smile.!!

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

जो बीत गई सो बात गई

जीवन में एक सितारा था
माना वह बेहद प्यारा था
वह डूब गया तो डूब गया
अंबर के आंगन को देखो
कितने इसके तारे टूटे
कितने इसके प्यारे छूटे
जो छूट गए फ़िर कहाँ मिले
पर बोलो टूटे तारों पर
कब अंबर शोक मनाता है
जो बीत गई सो बात गई
जीवन में वह था एक कुसुम
थे उस पर नित्य निछावर तुम
वह सूख गया तो सूख गया
मधुबन की छाती को देखो
सूखी कितनी इसकी कलियाँ
मुरझाईं कितनी वल्लरियाँ
जो मुरझाईं फ़िर कहाँ खिलीं
पर बोलो सूखे फूलों पर
कब मधुबन शोर मचाता है
जो बीत गई सो बात गई
जीवन में मधु का प्याला था
तुमने तन मन दे डाला था
वह टूट गया तो टूट गया
मदिरालय का आंगन देखो
कितने प्याले हिल जाते हैं
गिर मिट्टी में मिल जाते हैं
जो गिरते हैं कब उठते हैं
पर बोलो टूटे प्यालों पर
कब मदिरालय पछताता है
जो बीत गई सो बात गई
मृदु मिट्टी के बने हुए हैं
मधु घट फूटा ही करते हैं
लघु जीवन ले कर आए हैं
प्याले टूटा ही करते हैं
फ़िर भी मदिरालय के अन्दर
मधु के घट हैं,मधु प्याले हैं
जो मादकता के मारे हैं
वे मधु लूटा ही करते हैं
वह कच्चा पीने वाला है
जिसकी ममता घट प्यालों पर
जो सच्चे मधु से जला हुआ
कब रोता है चिल्लाता है
जो बीत गई सो बात गई
—   हरिवंशराय बच्चन
This one poem by the legendary writer has always been an inspiration for me . If nothing else, it has brought me back from dead.

Many mothers of my Kashmir will cry today

On June 30, Asif Rather, aged nine, ran out of his home in Baramulla in search of his older brother. Minutes later, he fell victim to a bullet fired by securitymen. He was just 150m from his front door. An elegy on the death of an innocent by Dr Syeda Hameed , writer and member of the Planning Commission

He stood at the sunlit door
A nine-year old with tousled hair
Asif Rather, student of class four,
Baramulla, 55 km from Srinagar
‘Where is Touqeer?’
He sought his older brother.
‘Nowhere! You come back now
Here’s tea and last night’s bread
My baby, let me comb your hair’
Outside, the sounds Allah o Akbar
Chanting at once, one thousand strong
‘Mother, I’ll get him back’
‘No child, Touqeer is big, he’s with friends
My youngest, you’re too small
See here is cream skimmed off the milk
Now come, you make me angry’
The little form at the sunlit door
Ran out, unheeding
The face appeared, smiling at the window pane
‘Mother, you can’t be angry; I’ll make you cry today’
And he was gone
Outside the milling crowds of tall and lanky youth
And one lost boy in a forest of long legs
And long sticks cut from poplar trees
Some hands clutch roadside stones
‘Touqeer!’ he called out
Was that his blue shirt?
But there were hundreds in blue
He felt the tears well up
Quick jammed with grimy fists.
He stood confused, afraid, ashamed
‘I should have had the milk and last night’s bread
So hungry and so far from Ma..
But Touqeer, where’s he?’
And then it burst
The tear gas shell tore his tender flesh
‘Allah’ he cried his small hand
warding off
the evil that drew blood.
The crowd stood still
A dozen hands reached out
To hold the falling body
His bullet broken neck
Gently rested on still hands
Of weeping boys
The tousled head of hair
Blood drenched, hung in strands
On a shining forehead...
And twisted in the sinews
of my mind
Are seven words
(Seven lines of Quran’s first Surah)
‘Mother I will make you cry today’
How many mothers of my Kashmir
The place where I was born
Will cry today?
Will cry tomorrow? 

(ref: Many mothers of my Kashmir will cry today)

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Me against Myself..!!

have u ever had a conversation with yourself...!!
must have had...its the most effective communication; tells the most untold fact about nobody else....but "yourself".
But talking with oneself is the most stressful one too...because nobody knows the facts & facets more than we do. Arguing with oneself is the most tiresome job; there never a solution to it. Angel & Evil never give up.
..I've been arguing with myself for past few solution yet. Am still confused which way to go.
Sometimes the more neutral and diplomatic voice of mine what you feel today is right, do not think about the past or the future, live in the present. But before this voice of mine completes the sentence, the evil and the angel rise up.
i still have no idea which way to go...coz either life would vanquish.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Money Matters..!!

phew....thank god i have something where i can blabber as much as i can...what ever i feel... :)
hail...who so ever created BLOG.. :) i begin....d tittle..can b read two matters...meaning its essential and money matters..meaning the "lafdas" due to money....
I wonder why nobody is contended with people want to be more rich. I always thought people who juts have enough so they can fulfill their necessities are the happiest...but i was wrong. Nobody is content with what they have.
when i was young my dad taught me " utna hi pav pasaro jitni lambi chaddar"...means spend that much you can afford. I've adhered to his words since then. But i wonder, other parents must have taught their children the same thing, then what prompted "LOAN CULTURE". People are following it blindly. It is a one way profit route n people know it...but wont give up show off....
But the biggest irony is that money is coming in between relations, be it any. One thing that really annoys me is people cribbing about money 24X7. I do agree money is a important part of life...but why making it the heart of life. Why spoil a beautiful relationship we have with some one because of few zeroes.

Wednesday, February 3, 2010


Saturday evening I met my school friends, two of them i met after 3years, after we all passed out. It was an amazing experience, all girls outing. Though it's been 3 years we all passed out, lot of time has passed, we all have gone through our set of transitions, but the love and care we shared for each other is still there. Probably the bonding has grown more stronger. This is because we all have matured our bit with passing time, have better understanding for each other.

Meeting with old friends is always good, its always good to know that somebody has got your back. Atleast with them, you don't have to act in a certain way, be sacred of being judged.

A lot of time might have passed, we might not be living together now (we were in boarding school,we know everything about each other, pun intended), but the love that we share, would be with us forever.

I love you my baby kins.

Friday, January 29, 2010

Blogger's Experince

Been almost a year that i started blogging. Am too fascinated by the idea of blogging. It  is like reading your "dear diary" aloud to people. Letting people peep into insides of our life. little details, happy and not-so-happy experiences.
Am not a very "open-book" kind of person. I love my own space, being with myself gives me immense pleasure, so this idea of blogging didn't quite amuse me initially, but later with its brewing popluarity i couldn't resist myself too.
And this undoubtedly has been the most amusing experiences I've had. I don't have many readers, followers. My only reader is my daddy, who makes sure to go through my blog everyday. Readers, followers, comments is something i never expect on something that i write. I am satisfied to read myself on the screen. My thoughts seem more clear to me. It assures me of my wisdom and righteousness. Mention of wisdom and righteousness is not self-brooding, its just reminds me of my conscious and proves to me time and again that GOD has given us the vision to discriminate between write and wrong ; its just our fault that we don't see through it.
It would be wrong if i don't mention that blogging satisfies my "likhne ka kida". I am lazy, but never lazy to read or write; because this is a only way i express myself. I cannot empower myself upon others with words, verbal fights of mine are just with my maa and daddy; for others i prefer keeping quite. Writing puts my worries to rest. Blogging is more of a stress buster for me. Good or bad..i try to wrap them up in words and feel unburdened.
It gives me my space, to express my self on which ever matter that i feel like, be it of national concern or nobody's concern.
And i know i would keep doing it. :) :)

Sunday, January 24, 2010


"Sapne to fir sapne hote hai...sach hai ye kaab apne hote hai........."
Dreaming, a voluntarily involuntary action. My dreams are no less too, i too dream big, huge, a frame few can see. Those who cant see "my big picture" disagree with me and those are the ones who advocate about dreaming within limits. I strongly disagree with them. Aree bhai, sapno ke limitations kisne banai, we don't need Visa to travel into dream land (sorry, i tried to copy Gulzaar saab's magic into my blog ). To me, dreams signify possibility, probability of what may happen, can happen, rather would happen, if we work upon it. For me, its a secret world, a world which completely belongs to us, where i set myself free, free to discover the undiscovered, explore the unexplored ;within myself and surroundings. In my dreamland, i realize the importance of the things that we surpass, the meaning they hold ; they are there, have always been ; waiting to be discovered.
Dreamland is where nobody pokes us saying, "You can't do this". Its a world where we never lose, where just my strengths matter.
Few days back when me and daddy were discussing about my future and what i wanted to do further. I told him I wanted to take up media and journalism. He did not take it seriously. I shared it with few other "wise" people, nobody found my decision correct. I was the only one supporting myself. When i asked for reasons why shouldn't i take up journalism , they showered upon me zillions of reasons, none of which i entertained. And then came there "wisdom streak", concluded saying "am confused". Am confused because i'l b graduating with biotechnology as my subject, have a diploma is aviation and hospitality and then shifting to journalism.
I preferred keeping my calm and maintaining a "no-comments" status. I won't dent their concern upon my stability, but discouraging my efforts did hurt me. I've now discovered the reason behind my instability. One of them being my parents, both of them. I've inherited very active"jumping genes". Second being my desire to have it all. Am never satisfied with a little bit of this and little bit of that, i want it all, all in full quantity. I want to dance around with Shahrukh, travel in a space shuttle, be the prime minister, sit along with Barkha Dutt and interview Amitabh Bachchan, own an IPL team, travel around the world. para-glide, jet-ski. My imagination digests it all, views it all. I've a desire to prove the phrase "Jack of all and master of none". I want to be the master of all and jack of none.
Though my dreams are larger than life, i try to fit my frame in not-so-larger life, because, my dreams keep me alive and kicking.

Saturday, January 16, 2010


....A month almost year is no more new.... but feeling new gives a reason to smile.
New year, for me, is a new beginning. It's God's way of telling us, v can always start afresh, all we need is courage.
Am not an avid blogger, i don't write so often. Not that I don't have enough things to write about, but its just i have to many things going on in mind. But dis year's new year resolution includes "blogging" too. I just hope i adhere to this one.
So, coming back to the "serious" stuff.
My year began with nothing special, i didn't want to start it the lazy way as i did. Second day too wasn't the happiest one. N after that i was jobless, bored to death.
So, i thought of actually doing something. Recall the entire year, things that the past year has taught me.
After all the thinking, i thought to myself its not that i didn't know those things, all i needed was a reminder.
Still,i would right it all, you never know when we need a reminder. I hope i write it all. :) :)
1. I am responsible for my life. No matter who takes the decision and no matter in whose pressure i took that decision, i would have to bear the brunt. If the turn out is well, nobody would not do a moments delay in taking away the credit, and it it doesn't turn out well, wont take a moment in stepping back.
2. Money matters. Yes they do. Though they don't give me a high and i know for the heck of it i would not do anything and am very proud of myself about that. But it does matter, to some extent money is a base for everything. With passing time and high pace development, people are earning more , and the value of it is decreasing. "Jitna mile wo kaam"
3. This year taught me the meaning of "Mann changa to kathauti me ganga". when you are happy world is happy because nobody, n by nobody i mean nobody is interested is listening to our sob stories. They have enough of there own.
4. This world ain't a bad place at all. N whats interesting to see is, according to whats my mom says is "KARMA CYCLE", we struggle a lot to be born as humans and then struggle even more harder to attain "MOKSHA", so that we are never born as humans. And if its true, then i have struggled my bit to have been born as a human. Its a blessing by God and a blessing is never bad.
5. Nothing gives much more happiness and satisfaction than giving happiness to others.
6. This year reminded me of my courage. I need nobodies pity, i have struggled my bit with the best was i can. It reminded me that am not a coward, i do not run away from situations.
7. I realized i am far more than blessed. Am actually God's favorite child. He has send me with everything all he wants form me is to realize my potential and search a bit in me.
8. Don't idolise anyone. I look upto my Dad, Maa, Shahrukh Khan, Mansingh Sir, Sangeeta Mam, i always wanted to be them. But off-late I've realized even they aint perfect. When i came to know the "other" incidences of few of them, keeping my parents aside because they are dauntless n flawless ; I found my idols being nothing else but "me" n i no more fond that endearing as i did before. I realised that its true when they say "Nobody is perfect" ;all have done their share of mistakes and learnt from them. I no more want to be like them, becuase the world already has them and its awaiting for me, for who i am.
...Lots more i learnt, would edit the post as soon as something comes up, again.
Wish this year brings more knowledge and wisdom for me.
....N to d the entire world.
Thank you.
Love n care.


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