Thursday, February 24, 2011

To the women of today

While browsing through various blogging sites, i found IndusLadies , and the competition announcement here got me excited.I thought to myself, what is the harm in participating and I had this very blog post written in my draft long back, but never found the exact time to post it.This seemed perfect.This contest is in prelude to International Woman's Day.Topic is: “A perspective on roles of Indian Women”, it is the celebration of womanhood.So, this is my entry for the contest.I tag Mystical Skeptical Me, Fatima and Annie.

Indusladies 2nd Annual International Woman's Day Blog Contest

Smart, focused, multitasking, well read would be one of the few adjectives that are used to describe the "women of today". She has come a long way from being confined in a stereotypical box, programmed to play the perfect daughter, sister, wife, daughter-in-law.Now she is all this and much more.
If not entirely, society has now giving her the status that she was claimed to have.She is now both an ideal wife and an ideal employee. She isn't happy with just one, because she is aware of her capacity to do more.

To me, women is the sole reason for the existence of this world, as she is the the only one conducive to life.Her prime role is of a mother,she not only gives birth. but nurtures the world with her warmth and love, protects them from the atrocities.
Never has a women been in the center stage, because she has the heart to back down and let others flourish. Society has always been gender biased, men have always been considered superior to women, and she quietly settled in the backseat, so that they feel comfortable being the forefront.

Women has always been a night watchman.When in trouble, she is the one to rely on. She'll take everything on her stride and lay forth a smooth path for everybody else to walk on.Women have always been mocked about being a complex human, about being the sole reason for differences.Little notice has been given on how selfless her deeds have always been, just because she loves you, she'll sacrifice herself and never even ask.Even if they have been selfish, they were thinking about the well being of her family.

Today, women is everywhere, there is nothing that a woman hasn't accomplished.And there would be nothing that she won't be capable of.Be it an entrepreneur or a home maker, they have there own success stories.They are not just responsible for their own success, but for others too.

A lot has been written on paper, she is a deity on on paper and a doormat in real.Things have improved a lot from my mom's time to mine, but there is still scope. The one thing that didn't change was, a women was happy being both, a deity and a doormat, as long as everybody else was happy.And this is her beauty.

Many stories are published about the strength of women, and how she freed herself from the clenches of an overpowering man.But those are just drops in ocean. Every woman has a story of her own, which might not appeal somebody to write a book, but there is a story.From our mothers to us, somewhere, we all have fought our own battles.She has cried her eyes out, felt weak, but with each tear drop, they could see the light refracting, they never gave up. I, myself, have seen a story unfold in front of my eyes.

A girl, married at the age of 15, now 55, has struggled all her life and still is.Being married at such a young age,little did she knew, what she had in store.All her life she fought, when she couldn't have a child,when her husband fought with death,when in laws assaulted her,when she had a little girl, when she was told to marry her off.She couldn't study much, but has a eye for textile, she can easily give a NID graduate a run for their money.Every battle, she fought with her poise intact, never did she succumb the pressure. Though, herself couldn't study much, but gave her daughter all resources. From her i learned, education does enlighten you, but there's more knowledge waiting for you in the outside world.Education, independence is required, but it is not just for the so call "educated" women.The woman of today is not who has degrees from Oxford, but is the one who believes in herself.

A woman's success today is the outcome of her own strength,determination. She has earned it.

Helen Reddy's song describes every woman's feeling...

I am woman, hear me roar
In numbers too big to ignore
And I know too much to go back an' pretend
'Cause I've heard it all before
And I've been down there on the floor
No one's ever gonna keep me down again

Oh yes, I am wise
But it's wisdom born of pain
Yes, I've paid the price
But look how much I gained
If I have to, I can do anything
I am strong
I am invincible

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

The UGLY Truth

It was that time again, she was standing in the lab, doing the same practicals as she did last year..stirring the test tube...effervescence bubbles oozing out...
Gazing at them..took her back in time, when she was 16, fresh out of school, a carefree, happy-go-lucky, like any other ordinary girl.

Little did she knew about what awaits her, how mean this world is.It was her first day of college, she was away from parents, she was bit scared but then it was a new beginning, she had the most bright smile on her face.That place didn't make her happy, it wasn't as welcoming as she had thought,but her hopes didn't die..she thought to herself,"It's just the first day".Following days were not friendly either, she was making up her mind slowly that these three years, won't be easy. But miraculously things changed, her classmates were now nice to her, teachers were kind too. She was now relaxed, she thought to herself, "I am so naive, after all we are all new here"

Now days were less stressful for her. She was back being herself. She had no clue, what awaits her, what was the motive of those people being nice to her.

One day, a teacher of hers called her in his cabin,she had asked for a book which was just available for staff members. She went in there with a smile, and when she came out the world had changed for her. She was not the same person any more, the world wasn't the same for her.

A tear rolled down her cheek, she came back in present,realized where she was standing. She finished her practical and went back home.

She sat in a corner, the memory of that day was still fresh in her mind, it haunted her every now and then.For the world, she was confident,unperturbed, but inside, she was shattered.

She had never expected what happened to her in that room, she couldn't believe what she heard her teacher saying. She was threatened never to open her mouth, she was too overwhelmed to react to anything that time.

She went back home for holidays, she was too scared and embarrassed to tell her parents about it. When she refused to join college again, her father guessed something was wrong. He tried asking, but she could never gather the strength to tell him everything.
He took her back to college, talked to authorities, they assured her she will be fine and the issue would be taken care of, he assured her, that she'll be fine here, everything is okay now.She was still scared, but she had faith in her father.

Three years passed, they weren't the best, but she was glad that its over. She can start it all afresh.

July 18, just the day she got through the college she wanted to join for her post grad, her graduation result came.It was the shock of her life.She wasn't given marks in her practicals, she FAILED.

She fainted the moment she saw this, she was an above average student all her life, she had never even reappeared for a re-test in class. This was huge, and more so because of the hostile three years she had. Now, nothing could have been done to rectify it. She had to repeat the whole year.Her parents supported her all through this, but the faith in her had died.

She just stood for what was right, she stood for her principles, sleeping with someone to take up a step ahead in life wasn't her. She took a stand,and she was crushed. That one year,taught her the meaning of Harper Lee's statement,"People are people where ever you put them". Nobody was same to her, when she used to worry about her future, people though of her being selfish, when she cried, people told her she herself doesn't want to be happy nor can she someone else happy.

She had maintained her composure entire year, but she was human after all, she had the right to cry when she was sad, she had the right to be afraid of the unknown.

She was hurt, the result did leave a scar on her academic qualification, but the consequences she went through, left a scar on her heart, that would never heal. People whom she counted on, whom she had thought would be friends for life, mocked her by calling her "Dukhi Atma". She wasn't a sad soul, she was just hurt.The guy she loved, despite of knowing her inside out, wasn't patient with her too.People told her she should have handled that situation, and when she asked them HOW, they had no answer.They complained that she wasn't the same anymore, she nodded along, because now she couldn't be the same.They accused her she didn't handle it well, she had nothing to say, but she thought to herself, i survived, i never gave hope, i believed things would change soon.She was sure, she'll get her happy ending.

And one day,when she had enough of them,she left them all. She was tired of people judging her, so one day she gave everybody a piece of her mind. And as she had expected, everybody left. But she had no regrets. All her life, she had learnt to stand up for yourself, and she did.She was hurt when everybody turned their back towards her, but she thought to herself, "this is the real world".You either lose your conscience, else, good luck surviving.

Only one complaint she had from the world, Why wasn't she WARNED.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Valentine Day, eh =/

Yeah, my reaction was the same, eh..!!
Valentine Days are least for me.Not a single valentine day, since the day i realized what valentines day are, have been good. =|
But now am thinking that curse is being lifted... :D
Yesterday went just fine...except for the part that my leg is bruised, by some ghost am guessing, because i don't remember when and how it happened. I slept fine, but woke up with terrible pain, so much that i can't even walk right now. But, yeah that's not the Valentine curse, am careless. =|
Every Valentine went fighting with THE VALENTINE, but this time, no fights, no disagreements at all. :D
I am not a believer of Valentines Day, but then, expressing your love, i would never so no to that. :D
Am not really a mushy mush, but, whats the harm in being one, for a day, ay ;-)
Entire day, was nothing mushy as such , i spent the day watching Castle and then Flashforward, what awesome series :D
Too much of hardcore stuff on Valentines Day, so then it was the "awwwwwww movies" time, saw Going the distance & then Letters To Juliet :)
Going the distance, had thought i would relate to, but naay, and Letters to Juliet,almost made me cry, and Brit Boys are super hot ;-)
How did yours go..?!?

p.s: Late post, because, web cam dinners are tiring ;-)

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Till distance does us apart....?!?

Him: Why does such a trivial thing matter so much to you, it a friend's sister engagement, not mine....why are we arguing about it.
She: Why didn't you care to tell me..?
Him: It wasn't important, it is nothing, i myself barely remember it.Big deal.
She: It is a big deal, for me.
Him: You just have a habit of making issues out of nothing.
She: Yes, its my habit, i have a habit of making issues about things i care.
Him: call this care, fighting over nothing, you call it care..?!?
She: I am fed up of being the second lady....
Him: Wait, wait wait....second lady...what are you accusing me of, i am cheating on long have you been thinking this way...this is amazing, my girlfriend thinks am cheating on her..this is your trust...this is what our relation was based on...i can't believe it..3 years..and you think this...
She: At least listen to me...let me finish....
Him: Finish, finish there anything left don't trust yourself are sick of being the second lady....second lady..what else does it mean....

He kept yelling at her for half hour, she kept quite, sobbed silently, he was a very calm person, this side of his was unknown to her, he didn't stop, he didn't want to listen, he kept blaming her...and she just kept silent...she knew he loves her, too much...all she wanted was to be heard.....
But he had made his decision, he left...!!

........and as he hung up, she mumbled to herself," fed up of knowing so less about you, am fed up of this distance, i know its still two years for you to finish college, but i am fed up of not being there with you, of not knowing everything about you, am fed up of this distance taking toll on me, i don't want every minute record of yours, but i just don't want to miss any bit of you, i love you so much"

Casper had said," If i tell you i love you, can i keep you forever...?", may be she should have said it, loud and clear, or may be the vows should be changed to...."Till distance does us apart"

p.s: Tomorrow is Valentines Day, wishing everybody happiness and love :)

Saturday, February 12, 2011

....but that memory never faded

Just like any other day...she was sitting gazing at her laptop, when a kid's howling distracted her. And soon before she could realize, a tear rolled down her cheek.

That cry was familiar to her, that plea for help, the immense faith on kins & being let down. That child calling his mother to help him, it was her few years back. The tear was unwilling to roll down, but she had no control, memories raced back, that crying of hers was echoing in her ears, she could feel herself struggling again, she could hear herself screeching, holding out for her kins to come save her.

She didn't want to walk back on that path, she tried to tuck herself to sleep, but that voice, that screeching became louder, as if that pain was pulling her back, she crumbled, as if protecting herself, but by then it was too late, she could feel those bruises again, she could see her kins standing at the door ,when her uncle beat her, she wished, to death.She was in pain, and she was sorry, all she wanted was for her hero's to come and save her.With each hit, her faith was bruised. With the image of her kins standing at the door, her eyes shut.

She woke up startled, all sweaty, throat hurting, eyes wet. She felt her body to find those bruises while she swallowed the lump in her throat, they weren't there. She took a deep breath. Just then, her Mom came, to ask if everything was fine with her, she forced a smile, nodded and said, "Nightmare, Maa". Her Mom smiled back to her and closed the door behind her as she left.

And as her mother walked away, a tear rolled down again. She knew it wasn't a nightmare,she relived one. 6 years later, a child she merely knew, made her race to the memories, she had thought she had forgotten.

She lied down, curled up in her bed,thinking why didn't they stop her uncle.She was just 14, little did she knew about good and bad, they could have punished her, not bruised her for life, after all she was their child. She fell, and it was their duty to pick her up and put her back on track, not push her more towards the pit.

She still thought no less of her kins, neither did she love them any less, but a void was there, her why was unanswered, she was bruised for life.

Those scar might have faded.....but that memory never did.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Ba ba black sheep....have you any SCHOOL

Monster Admission is back and is more cruel. First the victims were just school pass outs, crawling there way to Med schools/B Schools/Law schools/Engg Colleges. Now the evil Admission Monster is not sparing tiny tots, just out of their cocoon.

Li'l kids, in this chilly Delhi winter morning,along with there helpless yet hopeful parents, were taking round of schools, trying to find one tiny way to get in, to be there in the "eligible" list set down by school administration.

This Admission Monster is becoming stronger with passing years, the creators of this monster are providing it with more and more power.

It is torturous enough prepping to get into college, now setting up such strict norms for primary education is pure evil. Its is every child's right to be entitled to primary education. With growing population in India and limited resources, its hard enough to get a child enrolled in a school, and now setting up a "cut-off" mark for a 4 year old...what the hell.

Parents were and still are, interviewed before admission, which sounds fair enough, but interviewing a child, who just dressed up and came there because his daddy promised him/her a candy, is insane. A 21 one year old me has no clue about what i want in life and many a times can't talk sense, how on this earth do you expect a toddler who still can't sleep without bed time story from Mommy, to talk sensibly and know it all.

Entrance exam to get admission in Pre-nursery/Nursery, what the phuck. Aren't CAT/MAT/AIEEE/IITJEE/GMAT/SAT/DPMT enough? And moreover, what are those people testing the children for..?!? Those kids are 4 and they are being sent to school, so that you teach them all those things, if parents have to teach everything, then why are they paying to maximum fraction of their income..?

And if all these grilling sessions was not enough, private schools just can't get enough money, they would rob one & they would rob all. Recently a Hindi news channel, Aaj tak, did a sting operation on popular West Delhi Schools to find out the real story of admission procedure. According to government rule, a child/family from EWS (Economically Weaker Sections) are not supposed to be charged for any admission procedure. Government would be paying Rs1300 per student per month to the school for children, which is not enough of the school administration. Read the statement of Delhi Education Minister Arvinder Singh Lovely here. Even after such strong statement from the education Minister itself , the school authorities fail to follow the law. In that sting operation, all those "popular" school were caught on camera asking for money. Even the school in which i studied for 10 long years was in the list. These videos are making it perfectly clear that even after admission, students and their parents wont be spared.

This piece of news just confirms how they never give up & by some way or the other find a disgusting ways to earn more & show less. Philanthropist they call themselves, i say Misanthropist, pure evil.

I don't know, whom exactly to blame, lack of governance, poor law and order or heartless administrators.What they don't realize or don't want to realize is, those kids are the future & they are not setting up a fine example. And this greed of theirs, would not only ruin the life of the kids, it'll come back & bite them in their ass too.


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